Caritas Care

Adoption: Finding my child…growing my family

Creating chances, choices & opportunities for people
to live the best lives they can.

Call: 01772 732313

Adoption: Finding my child…growing my family

If you have been considering adoption, you may many questions about your future child, for example;

How do I know the child or children will be right for me and my family?
What information will we receive about the child and their background?
What is my role when it comes to finding the right child or children for my family?
How long does it all take?
We hope this blog will help to answer some of these questions for you…

We start “family finding” or looking for a child or children for whom you are the right family- before you are approved- but not too long before! There are a number of different ways we do this:

Online Database
The main one is an online database, which is for understandable reasons, not open to the general public; this will hold information about you, your lifestyle and the age and number of child/children you are looking for, the needs you can meet etc. plus photos – and similar information about children – their age, needs etc… and in most cases,  photos. You can register on the site and you and your social worker can search on there to find a child or children who you would like to enquire or seek further information about. The child’s social worker will be doing the same. Once a preliminary agreement to progress has been made further information is shared.

Attend an Exchange Event
At these events there are stands with information about children seeking families in the form of profiles, photos and often videos. You can meet the children’s social workers and ask them about the child. You can express interest in any of the children and your social worker will follow this up with the Local Authority after the event.

Attend an Activity Day
Activity Days takes this stage one step further…the children waiting for adoptive families attend these events.  Don’t worry about how they understand this, from their point of view they are just having a party! Also if this was not right for a child they would not attend. Prospective adopters also attend and it provides a great opportunity to see children in a relaxed environment having fun, playing with other children and see how they relate to their foster carer. Again you can express interest in children after the event.

The most used method is communication between your social worker and the many different Local Authorities. If you are someone that would rather put your trust in your social worker when family finding we can do this for you and share different children who we feel are suitable.

So that is the practicalities of the main methods for family finding…now for the emotions of it!

It is emotional! It is a balancing act between the heart and the head. Some people want to take every child home and really struggle to focus on just one or two. Some people look for children who share their interests or who sound or look like them or members of their family, who would seem to “fit in”. There is no doubting this is not an easy process and it may take time depending on what you are looking for and the numbers of children waiting. You might completely “fall in love” with a child and not be selected. We would prepare you for this and support you to understand the decision making process and try not to let you get ahead of yourself – this is easier for some than others!

Most adopters tell us how they decided that they were the right family for their child and that it simply “felt right” – who are we to argue with that?

However there are many stages to this process and we ensure that you have all the information you need to make this monumental decision – it is your decision to make.

The main thing is to be as open as possible and to always bear in mind that this is a little child who, for a variety of reasons has had a tough start in life- there will be lots of information written about their needs and what has happened but at the end of all that- it is a child. . . .

We have some tips for you to help you through the family finding process:

Remain Hopeful: Finding the right child for you and for them can be challenging, but it’s essential to remain hopeful and optimistic. Your perfect match is out there, and the right family will come into your life at the right time.

Be honest and Express your opinions: Don’t hesitate to express your preferences, interests, and needs to your social worker. Your input matters, and it can help us to find the best possible match for you.

Stay Connected: Maintain connections with friends, and family members who can offer encouragement and guidance during your adoption journey.

Be Patient: Finding the perfect family can take time, but trust that the process is working in your favour. Stay patient and resilient, knowing that the right family is worth the wait.

Family finding is a journey filled with both challenges and rewards. By approaching the process with patience, openness, and a focus on the well-being of the child, you can build meaningful connections and create your forever family.

If you have any questions about adoption, please get in touch.  We’d love to hear from you.  No obligations, no pressures, just a chat.

Get in touch by completing the contact form opposite or call us on 0800 652 6955.

Interested in Adoption?
Contact the Team
Fill out this field
Fill out this field
Fill out this field
Fill out this field
Are you interested in Adopting with Concurrent Planning for babies & young children? Please select one (optional)
Select an option
Request a Callback
Select an option
Where did you hear about us?
Select an option
Mailing List Signup *
You need to agree with the terms to proceed

More Similar Posts

Skip to content